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• Random Posts

  • Tea Party Leader Caught Using Food Stamps for Beer and Donuts
  • People are shocked that Dick Clark was only 82 when he died.
  • New Al-Qaeda plot: Offshore Drilling in the Gulf of Mexico
  • Gingrich takes turn as frontrunner
  • US AND C.I.A. KILL AL QAEDA’s NO. 3 LEADER (again)
  • Sign of the times: Government running ads during state of the union, not unlike what occurs during a soccer game
  • Obama’s press secretary explained that Secret Service agent was unable to pay for prostitute because of draconian Republican cuts in the secret service’s whore procurement budget.
  • Bashar al-Assad’s career options: (1) get shot in the face by a drunk Arab, driving a beat-up pickup; (2) war crimes tribunal in the Hague; or (3) head coach of Penn State.
  • Republicans apologize to BP for inconvenience caused to their drilling operations by the Gulf of Mexico
  • Goldman Sachs used Bailout Money to pay Record Bonuses to Executives Who Spent Most of their Day on Facebook
  • President Obama declares National Emergency upon discovering that the BP oil spill has spread to the White House
  • North Korea missile breaks apart on launch, considered a major blow to the commonly-held perception of Asian intellectual superiority.
  • Mitt Romney gives speech defending Bain Capital: “Greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right. Greed works. Greed clarifies, cuts through, and captures, the essence of the evolutionary spirit. Greed, in all of its forms; greed for life, for money, for love, knowledge, has marked the upward surge of mankind and greed, you mark my words, will not only save Teldar Paper, but that other malfunctioning corporation called the U.S.A.”
  • UN Security Council ups pressure on Gaddafi: Cuts off his supply of purple eyeliner.
  • Exit Strategy: Gaddafi to replace Charlie Sheen on “Two and a Half Men.”

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