"I was not told that there was to be no tickling in Congress."

The United States Army gave its annual award to that American, who did the most to promote the image that everyone in the Navy is gay. This year that award went to ex-Rep. Eric Massa (D-NY) for his tireless work in that area. Notably, Massa was known for giving other Navy shipmates, “Massa Massages.” But he wasn’t just the popularizer of “Massa Massages” in the Navy, he also let the public know about the Navy’s “Crossing the line ceremonies.” The ceremonies, which mark the first time sailors cross the equator, can include everything from cross-dressing to simulated sex. He brought his photo album for his “Crossing the line ceremonies” to the Glen Beck show to show Glen’s progressive audience. Glen Beck thought he was going to get some good dirt from Massa on corrupt Democrats; instead he wished that he employed a little don’t ask/don’t tell. The Army’s vote for Massa was unanimous; the only other time the Army had a unanimous vote for this award – the Village People for their hit, “In the Navy” in the 1970s. A spokesman for the Navy summed it up best, “We need another Tailhook scandal.”